Crosses and Nuts

Battleship Review #2:

Have you played Battleship sitting in a classroom, oblivious to some excruciatingly boring monotone? So, I have emotional attachments to Battleship, and when Hasbro’s eponymous game is turned into a movie, that for me is something to watch. While Alex Hopper (Taylor Kitsch) makes lieutenant and dates the beautiful Samantha (Brooklyn Decker), the latter is the daughter of Admiral Shane (Liam Neeson) and holds Alex in anything but high regard. The stage is set off the coast of Hawaii for Alex to prove himself, with an alien invasion in response to a terrestrial signal. So, Battleship is about impenetrable force fields and naval set-pieces and one lieutenant finally finding his feet and the courage to pop the question. And Battleship is fun to watch

13/20

Battle Stations

I saw the reviews of Battleship and was duly turned off. The movie turned me back on. In a sentence, I would describe this movie as a light take on alien invasion. The corvettes and destroyers are there aplenty, and the US and Japanese fleets show exemplary celluloid solidarity in seeking to destroy a near-impregnable alien fleet. There is all the Hollywood science in measured doses, but most of the movie just consists of Marine bravado, and much heavy air strikes and shelling. Battleship is an easy watch, and meant to be so. And, with the heavy metal soundtrack overlay and all, one leaves the hall suitably fulfilled by the popcorn fare

13/20

The John

It seems that in the age of special effects, we, the humble viewers, are consigned to a life of hackneyed scripts, boring characters, and stereotypical morality plays, even as the director and producer have fun with, well, special effects. Its been a while since I actually got a headache from watching a movie (due respect to Edgar Rice Burroughs, he just ran into a veritable onslaught of similar movies). On to the storyline. John Carter (Taylor Kitsch), an American Civil War Confederate General, is mysteriously transported to Mars. Lo and behold, we are cast into a Civil War in Mars (!) wherein the intrepid John Carter, on account of his sublime jumping skills, finds a leadership role in leading the planet’s good guys, notably the people of Princess Dejah Thoris (Lynn Collins) against the evil hordes of Matai Shang (Mark Strong). Some of the pioneers of the science fiction genre need to be given an honorable burial, instead of being inflicted upon unsuspecting viewers

9/20